How to Kiss “First Kiss” (Avoid THESE 7 Mistakes)

7 Common Kissing Mistakes

I know I’ve been there a lot of times in the past. And, if you’re reading this, I bet you’ve been there many times, too.

I was having an awesome time with the girl I was talking to at the bar. We both sense a great connection, but for some unknown reasons, as the date ended, I realized I’ve completely blown it with the kiss.

Making your move for the kiss… and how you go about doing this, says a lot about you than anything else that you comes out of your mouth the entire night.

A woman will ALWAYS be paying attention to little things about you as she’s hanging out with you. And certain qualities of a guy are exposed when he tries to kiss her.

Here are some of the things a woman may learn about you:

  • Are you shy and timid?
  • Are you the dominant leader type?
  • How much “social intelligence” do you have?
  • How experienced you are with women?
  • Are you just scared of women?
  • Do you understand women?

These are some of the things a woman will instantly learn about you the minute you go in for the kiss? Sadly, a lot of men completely mess it up by making any one of the following common mistakes.

Even though it is still possible to recover from making any one of these common mistakes listed in this article, the impression you leave on a woman will better if you don’t make them in the first place.

How to Kiss Well (Avoid THESE 7 Mistakes)

MISTAKE #1. Going for the kiss way too soon…

Always be aware as to where she’s emotionally involved in the interaction… before going in for the kiss

Even though it’s better to go for in a kiss sooner than later (because she’ll respect you for that), oftentimes, it is self-sabotaging behaviour.

Most women already have a time period set in their mind how long they need to be with a guy before he can kiss her. And even though a woman may feel the urge to kiss a guy early during the interaction, she’ll still resist his attempts simply because it does not align with the timeframe she has already set in her mind.

Most women set this timeframe just to not appear as a “slut” to the man, to herself, or his friends. So even if you may have an incredible urge to kiss her, you must be always aware as to where she’s emotionally involved in the interaction.

MISTAKE #2: Giving up way soon after the first rejection

As I’ve mentioned earlier, often times a woman will have an urge to kiss a man… but she won’t because it’s not congruent with a timeframe she’s set in her mind. And because of this reason, these women will simply turn their cheek away or simply push a guy as he moves in for the kiss.

Most guys give up and move on like little boys at this point. They become so embarrassed at the rejection that they often spend the entire night brooding and never taking the trouble to try again to kiss her.

This makes the woman feel greatly disappointed. And it also shows her how insecure you are with yourself that you can’t even handle the smallest obstruction.

And it also shows her for a man that you are, insecure and unsure of himself that he can’t even overcome the smallest objections.

However, just the act of trying to kiss her again after the initial rejection instantly makes you come across as a confident, dominant, aggressive, and “quite different” from all the other dudes who walked away with their tail between their legs.

MISTAKE #3: Not touching her before going for the kiss

Oftentimes, a woman wants to have some anticipation building for the kiss. In fact, for a woman, the anticipation and build up are more pleasant than the act of kissing itself.

And most guys completely ignore this. And this annoys women. And sometimes it annoys them so much that they won’t let a guy kiss her simply because he didn’t have the skills to do it ‘properly’.

So what’s the best way to build up to a kiss and let a woman know that it is coming? The answer is pretty simple: start touching her more and more. Touching can start with lightly touching her on her elbows as you talk to her, or holding her hands as you steer her through a place, or placing your hand on her back as you lean in… BUT it has to begin.

Once you feel that a woman is really comfortable with you touching her… you can almost bet she is ready to be kissed.

MISTAKE #4: Asking her if it’s “Okay” to kiss her

Asking her if it’s “Okay” to kiss her is approval seeking behavior, which is very, very, very unattractive!

That’s right, too many guys think that they need a woman’s consent to kiss her. Oftentimes, these guys will wait until the time if wrong and all of a sudden let the woman know that they “really want to kiss her.”

This is NOT what a woman wants from a man.

Yeah, of course, a woman wants to know it is coming… but not with “words.” She wants to know it’s coming because gradually you’ve started touching her more and more, or you’ve started holding long and strong eye contact with her, or you’ve begun slowing down your speech.

Why is asking for a woman’s permission to kiss her so wrong? It is wrong because you’re HANDING THE POWER TO HER. In modern society, women desire a man who commands power, not the other way around.

MISTAKE #5: Missing “the moment”

Another big mistake that a lot of guys make is taking themselves right past the moment to kiss a girl. These men are oftentimes insecure, timid, shy or simply scared, who believe there is something “wrong” with kissing a woman. For unknown reasons these men simply can’t accept the fact that a woman really wants to kiss them.

So they keep on looking for more “indicators of interest” from women. And more signs. And more signs.

Until the moment has passed and the woman is heading for the “exit.”

Now, there’s “a particular moment” in the interaction where both of you can sense it’s the proper time to kiss. Your instinct will tell you when that moment has arrived. It’ll be crystal clear to both of you. Once you sense that moment…. simply go in for the kiss. If you skip that “moment,” the woman will view you as someone who totally lacks any “social intelligence” and she’ll most likely lose any attraction she may have felt for you at first.

MISTAKE #6: Waiting for the “right moment”

The men who commit this blunder aren’t typically as insecure or scared as the guys who “miss the moment.” But these men probably have been watching a lot of “romantic comedies” lately and they wrongly believe there is a proper time and place to kiss a girl.

They personally feel that they can’t kiss a girl in a bar, in their car, or in public. These guys wrongly believe that the only “proper time” for the first kiss is at the very end of the night.

But here’s the secret: there’s no perfect moment for the first kiss.

You must kiss a girl the moment you feel that the two of you are sharing a good sense of attraction and connection. Personally speaking, I’ve had tons of my first kisses in the most inappropriate times and places. In fact, the more spontaneous the kiss is, the more the woman will most likely see you as an adventurous, fun, and spontaneous guy.

MISTAKE #7: Mis-understanding a woman’s “politeness” as interest

Almost everyone has experienced this. We’ve all been hanging out with a hot babe who is super “polite” to us… and in our desperate need for sex… we make ourselves believe that she is attracted to us sexually.

And even when the woman isn’t showing you the usual signs of interest like touching you, making an eye contact with you, or becoming nervous, or suggesting verbally anything that would make you to believe that she wants you to kiss her… you oftentimes wrongly believe “she wouldn’t be so polite if she wasn’t into me.”

Yes, she could.

Here’s the fact: if a woman is being too nice and polite and not showing any signs of tenseness or nervousness… she probably sees you as a guy who is non-threatening.

Now, that’s not the kind of guy you want to be.

Stay chilled,


P.S. Here’s another related article on the topic: When a Woman won’t Kiss YOU