I used to have “approach anxiety.”
It was a very serious issue and I sucked at it BIG time.
And, if you’re reading this, I bet you also have this annoying problem in your life, which may be preventing you from going out and meeting ‘new’ people, especially women…
… unless and until you don’t do SOMETHING about it.
What is approach anxiety?
“Approach anxiety” is a fear of approaching strangers. This fear prevents you from meeting the kind of women you truly want to know more…
… by filling your head with all kinds of “irrational fears” and mental chatters.
Now, before I give you a few insightful tips on how to easily overcome fear of approaching beautiful strangers and building amazing connections, I want you to first understand a couple of important things that most guys have a difficult time believing.
- You can NEVER completely eliminate your “approach anxiety.” Even the world’s best seducers STILL have this irritating fear.
- NO “quick fix,” “magic-pill” or “shortcuts” that can magically help you get rid of this life-plaguing fear; only a “rock-solid mindset” (“inner game”) can.
Where does it come from?
Approach anxiety comes from your false beliefs, insecurities, and wrong assumptions.
It is NOT “real.” Instead, it’s just a protection mechanism to prevent you from getting hurt from the harsh wide world out there.
So now that you KNOW (and hopefully understand) WHAT “approach anxiety” is and WHERE it comes from, let’s move to the interesting stuffs.
Here are a few specific things you can do immediately to “get rid” of your approach anxiety:
1. Approach girls you’re not interested sexually
Next time you head out of your house, approach girls you are not attracted to and just use them to make small talk, banter, and keep a conversation going and drop them once you start to feel comfortable. Use these girls just to get in “social state” (in the “groove”) and build your confidence, really quickly. These girls could be ANYONE — a woman walking on the street, a salesgirl, a waitress, or a shop assistants.
A simple exercise you can do: approach at least 5 girls a day until you start to feel as though you have control over approach anxiety and become more energised and happy.
2. Daily momentum
Listen. You can’t just say, “I’ll approach 5 girls and overcome my approach anxiety.”
It doesn’t work like that, dude.
Quite the opposite. You MUST get into the habit of approaching girls every single day of your remaining life and only you’ll be able to keep your approach anxiety under control. In other words, you have to make it a part of your new-found dynamic lifestyle.
Do this: keep a log of the number of girls you approached this week, 30 days, or even a full year… just to keep track of your progress. If you do this without a fail (let’s say, approach a girl every day for a whole month), don’t you think your fear of approaching chicks would vanish almost dramatically?
You bet it would.
3. Bet your wingman
Your wingman will help you pickup girls and get you out of the most tricky situations with girls, but there’s another way he can help you too: play a bet with him and risk losing all of your hard-earned money.
For example, you bet him that if you’re unable to approach a certain number of girls (let’s say, 10 girls) within the next couple of hours, then you’ll have to give him $100… Don’t just talk about it. Get your wallet out and hand your $100 to him right there and then, because simply talking about it won’t work.
If losing $100 doesn’t matter to you much, then give your wingman your value, which holds a significant emotion behind it. This way you’ll MOST LIKELY follow through.
VERY IMPORTANT: BTW, when choosing a wingman, make sure he’s doing something that you want to do already — i.e. approaching women. If they have experience doing it, they can help you do the same.
4. Build your confidence overtime.
Confident doesn’t come to you just by wishing for it. It comes only when you put yourself out there, constantly pushing your comfort zone and challenging yourself. With regular practice and dedication, building MASSIVE amount of confidence becomes effortless.
Remember this: even though you’ll feel incredibly confidence after speaking to a random girl on the street, but that’ll slowly fade away throughout the evening. To keep it at its peak, you have to keep talking to ‘new’ girls.
5. Read/listen to affirmations and hypnosis, daily
I know some of you guys are not into affirmations or hypnosis, but if you’re open to new ways to build confidence, then I highly recommend that you listen to affirmations and hypnosis.
Listen to affirmations audio records EVERY DAY — in the morning and in the night.
Record yourself repeating “positive” messages of the person you envision to be and listen to this track every morning, just after waking up, and every night, just before you go to bed.
Write down your BIGGEST issue with girls. Let’s say, for example, if approaching girls on the street or any other social setting is your sticking point, then writing down this positive message on a piece of paper “I am easily able to approach women!” will be very beneficial for your success.
Once you’ve written this message, make sure to read it several times a day so that it sticks into your mind.
Also, surround yourself with “positive” affirmations. Yeah, I know, it sounds kind of “corny”, but it can WORKS incredibly well for you and eventually affect your state positively and transform your life for the better.
MAKE SURE to place all these positive messages somewhere where you can see it every day — on the wall, on your fridge, bathroom mirror, etc.
6. Be strict with yourself…
Have you ever heard about the “3 second rule”? I think it’s one of the best ways to overcome your fear of approaching women, pretty fast.
Remember: “rules” create “habits” and habits builds “momentum” into your life… and once you get into that “state” where you approach WITHOUT hesitation, then the rest will be pretty easy.
A few simple tips you can follow: When you head out, make sure to approach at least 5 girls EVERY DAY just to “warm up.” After the warm-up sets, approach at least 3 HOT chicks and speak with them… at least for 3 minutes.
7. Shift your “state”
“State shifting” is an incredible way to get yourself “in the mood” and build confidence. The great thing about this technique is that the MORE you do it, the easier it will be for you to enter into that “state of mind” on demand.
So the next time you’re feeling amazing because you just landed the number of a SMOKING HOT CHICK, push your thumb and forefinger tightly and hold it for a few seconds. Do this every time you feel that same rush of confidence to reinforce the belief.
So there you have it, dude: A few simple yet incredibly powerful ways to help you overcome your dreaded “approach anxiety.”
P.S. BTW, if you want to finally overcome your approach anxiety and be able to fearlessly walk up and talk to any women you desire without any fear, anxiety, and hesitation, then…