Best Ways to Start a Conversation with a Woman
Not having a clue how to start a conversation with women is one of the seven BIGGEST hurdles most guys have difficulty overcoming when approaching women they like.
A lot of guys ask these type of questions when approaching a woman:
- “Do I use some cheesy pickup line?“
- “Should I be DIRECT or INDIRECT?“
- “Should I ask for her opinion?“
The cold harsh truth about starting a conversation with a woman is that YOU need to be the first to ‘break the ice.’ She’s NOT going to do this for you. If you want to talk to her, you’ll have to approach her.
What to say to her?
The good news is there are several ways to strike up a conversation with a woman.
In this article, you’ll discover 3 simple ways to strike up a conversation with ANY woman. Remember, all of them are the ones I’ve personally used and tested when approaching beautiful women. And guess what, they WORK like wonders.
#1: “The Facial Expression Trick”
I want to be honest with you. My approaching skills aren’t that smooth. Like most guys out there, I hate the idea of thinking something clever to say when talking to a beautiful woman I am interested in. So one of the interesting thing I have done for myself is to build an attractive lifestyle and get women to do all the legwork.
Yeah, it’s kind of lazy, but you see, it works almost all the time. 🙂
The only problem I have is whenever I see an attractive lady across the street, I know the only way to meet her is to be a MAN and approach her. The huge problem is I really don’t like the long and complicated conversation starters. There’s too much to memorize. Rather, I am a big fan of using stuff that is direct and simple, which also gets the ball rolling.
I mean, who wants to waste 10 minutes telling awkward story, hoping the woman will find it interesting?
If I’m going to fail, why not fail fast, right?
Right! So whenever I see an attractive woman, I use my facial ‘trick’
conversation starter that almost works all the time.
In fact, it works almost 90% of the time when I used it.
Here’s what I mean: You can approach a girl without even spilling a word
from your mouth.
Whenever you’re in a public place, the natural (or human) thing to do is to
observe who’s (or what’s) around. Your goal is to use your surroundings to your advantage. So when you see a girl:
- You walk over to her and say whatever that comes to your mind.
- While doing so, hold eye contact with her, and smile 🙂
- Whatever she’s saying at the moment, flash an over-exaggerated look at her, which will make her laugh. I ALWAYS like to flash a funny and playful face.
Why does this work?
Here’s why: Well, most people (particularly most guys) act waay too serious when they’re in a social place like a club or a bar. Most guys are way too conscious to be themselves. They’re way too busy to give off that ‘tough guy’
vibe. I was that guy, too.
To set yourself apart from these clowns, what you can do is show that you don’t really give a damn about the outcome. That you don’t take life too seriously. By showing a woman that you’re playful and demonstrating that through expression, you show to her that you are a FUN guy.
Without even saying a word, you’ll automatically know that you’re the type of guy she’ll be interested to meet.
For me, I often start with, ‘Hey, did you get my text message?’ (if she’s looking at her mobile). This only gets her to laugh even more.
What type of faces you should make?
There’s no hard and fast rule to follow. But I suggest that you try to get her laugh. Follow these examples:
- Give her a ‘pouty’ look
- Stick your tongue out
- Give her a mock-embarrassed look.
- Show the exaggerated “pick up artist” wink.
- Show a fake a suspicious look (like you’re not sure why she’s looking at you.)
- Do a mock ‘in love’ expression (grab your chest and flutter your eyes)
- Send a quick wave
- Give a quick head tilt (like the “what’s up” expression)
- Pretend to be really angry and then crack up into a smile.
- Display big ‘shit-eating-grin’ smile.
At this point in time, you must be saying to yourself how will this even work for you.
Well, I can understand your pain.
But let me give you an example that my friend used. He isn’t the most handsome guy in the room, BUT he’s pretty successful with women.
Just a few years ago, he met his current girlfriend at a nightclub. After talking with her and making an eye contact, he went to great lengths to make her laugh (at my expense, I might say.)
Being such a great friend that he is, Aaron ‘threw me under the bus’ just to get a laugh.
As I was busy talking with other people, he just looked over to his girl as she was talking with her friends, and all of a sudden, he started to ‘fake-choking’ himself pointing at me with a smug look on his face. And before I could ask Aaron what the hell he was doing, he was across the room busy talking with his future girlfriend.
This brief story brings up a few KEY points:
- You do not need to rely on a better win.
- You do not have to rely on pick up lines or rely on gimmicks to start a conversation
- Just a warm smile and a friendly attitude can be your ‘secret’ weapon of getting girls
Remember: When using facial expression, she might look away from you initially. And making an eye contact with a complete stranger could be uncomfortable for a lot of guys. But if you keep on practicing with more women, it
would be as easy as a walk in the park.
Oftentimes, a girl will look away for a while and then wait for a few seconds before looking back again. And when she is doing this, MAKE SURE you do not turn away. Instead, keep smiling at her or nodding your head at her or use any of the funny expressions I just mentioned to you.
Just being playful with a girl will make her talk with you. And when you get a positive response from you (an enticing smile), you only have to walk over and talk with her.
#2: “Ask for her opinion”
The ‘opinion’ opener is also a great way to start a conversation with the ladies. And applying this simple technique is surprisingly easy. You only have to walk over to a woman and ask for her opinion on things.
Opinion opener does three things for you:
First of all, it allows you to start a conversation.
Secondly, it helps you get her attention (she has million other things to get distracted about).
And thirdly, it allows you to transition into getting to know her better mode.
That’s why it’s very different from other ‘conversation starter’ because it sounds natural, unlike corny pickup lines that most guys use without any success.
Here’s why asking for a woman’s opinion works:
- Women LOVE to offer their opinions.
- You can use the response you get from her and use it as a follow-up
- You’re not outrightly displaying your intentions.
- You become more interesting than other guys who don’t approach her.
Here are other few critical elements about ‘opinion opener’:
First of all, try to make it an open-ended question. So her response will be more than just a simple ‘yes’ or ‘no.
Secondly, if there other people in the group, involve everyone, and not just the girl you’re interested in. Do this to every group you approach so that they’ll get an impression you’re a fun, outgoing guy.
Thirdly, to make the ‘opinion opener’ even more effective, give yourself a time constraint.
If the group knows that you’re only going to stay there for a few minutes, then they’ll be more likely to open up with you and be friendly. You can easily accomplish this by starting the conversation like this: “Hey guys. A quick question…”
So you see constructing an opinion opener isn’t that difficult. You just have to sit down and think about 3 to 4 engaging questions you can ask any women.
For example, here are few opinion openers that I have used in the past, which worked really well with the ladies.
“Hey guys, just a quick question… My buddy and I was were having an argument yesterday that I hope you guys can settle…”
“We were having a discussion about our other close friend who cheated on her girlfriend and was caught red-handed…”
“Unfortunately, his girlfriend found this other girl’s g-string underneath his bed. To cover for himself, my friend told his girlfriend that he has a fetish for wearing women’s underwear. What’s really interesting is his girlfriend totally loves his new idea and makes him wear this G-string…”
“So can you guys help me solve this argument once and for all? What do you think: should he continue to cover himself or should he be honest with his girlfriend?”
Well, this opinion opener has been used by many guys in the past. So you’ll have to come up with something that’s a little bit different.
The main element I want you to pay attention is to pay the elements of humor, drama, and interest that’s been used in this opener. Remember to use all of these elements to create your own opener.
#3: “Go Direct”
This conversation starter doesn’t require you to play any ‘mind games’ with the ladies. Many guys think they need a ‘magical line’ to talk to women. But that’s really not true.
Sometimes, being direct generates the best result.
Here’s what I mean: You approach a girl you’re interested and let her know your intention of getting to know her better. You won’t rely on pick up lines, no gimmicks, and no opinions. You let her know that you saw something
interesting about her (maybe, it’s the way she’s walking, hairstyle, the earrings, or her long black coat, or whatever else you find enticing) and you want to know more.
The important point to remember when using this conversation starter is: You liked something about her that doesn’t have anything to do with her looks. So it should be an opener that relates to her actions (or her style)
rather than her attractiveness. That way you don’t come across to her as a ‘corny pick up artist.’
Instead you come across as a CONFIDENT guy who knows what he wants and isn’t shy to go for it.
In my case, I like to use different type of this conversation starter when I spot a cutie during the daytime.
With this technique, you walk up to a woman and tell her how busy you are, but then there was something intriguing about her that really made you want to go and talk to her. For example, you could say something like:
“Hey, I am on my way to (insert whatever you’re doing), but you seem like a friendly person and I had to come and meet you. My name is…”
Of course, this is a way to direct way of starting a conversation with women. She can either choose to get to know you better or she might say no. It’s like high risk/high reward thing.
With this conversation starter, you’ll often get rejected because the woman often has your looks and body language to judge you by. So if you’re not displaying a confident attitude, then she might blow you off.
But trust me when I say this: When the direct opener works, it really works. If she’s interested in you, you can say goodbye to a lot of game playing that you often have to deal with indirect openers.
Rather, you’ll head to the point where you both know you like each other. It’s also a great way to escalate things physically with the girl.
When you approach a girl with a ‘direct opener’ all you do is: Walk over to her, smile, and give her a nice compliment, and then tell her that you ‘just had to come and say hi to her.’
And that’s true, my friend. If you’re approaching this girl, odds are there is something intriguing about her that does stand out. (Hopefully it’s more than her looks.)
Depending on the situation (and what you want), you may want to use variety of adjectives other than ‘cool.’
For example, some of the words you can use are:
With this conversation starter, your action becomes random. If you do your approach right, you’ll come across as a confident guy who she has been fated to meet.
Here’s a great advice: The direct opener works really well during the daytime when you don’t have a lot of time to talk with people. Because of this, you’ll get right to the point, talk to her only for few minutes, and if you’re interested in her, ask for her number.
I highly recommend that you approach at least 5 to 10 women a day using this technique. It’s one of the best way to crush many of the mental roadblocks that I’ve discussed in this article.
P.S. Oh, almost forgot…
Do You Make THIS “Mistake” With Women?
The other day I heard an interesting story. This guy was in a bar and saw a
woman that he was attracted to. The more he stared at her, the more he wanted to meet her… but he couldn’t get himself to approach.
He kept repeating to himself over and over, “Come on… come over to me
and say hi. Just come over here right now.”
In other words, he wanted her to do the work of approaching him.
Regardless of what women say about how independent they are, they still prefer it when a man approaches them and initiates the conversation. In her eyes, if he can’t even get the courage to go say hello to her, then she won’t be able to trust him to handle any REAL conflict once they’re together.
So what should you do in this situation? She’s right there, you want to meet her, but you’re paralyzed with fear. Now what? Well if you use the secret revealed in this video, you won’t have to deal with this problem anymore:
In this free video, you’ll learn the single biggest reason why meeting women is so difficult, and the easy shortcut that takes you right to the kind of dating success and abundance you’ve always wanted.
It’s not going to be online forever, so go and and watch it right now. You’ll be surprised at how many more women you meet once you know these few simple secrets that change everything: