3 questions about “Sexy” Small Talk, Making a Woman Laugh, and What Does an Attractive Conversation Sound like…
I had a chance to interview Bobby Rio, creator of Conversation Escalation: Make Small Talk Sexy.
Since the topic of the program is creating more fun, flirtatious, and “sexual” conversations with women- I figured I’d get some tips out of him for improving your conversation skills and creating attraction in women.
1. What is exactly is “sexy small talk”?
I refer to “sexy small talk” as conversation that is fun, playful, and flirtatious.
For a long time I only had two modes; either I was in boring “interview” mode or I was in deep rapport talking about serious topics.
What I realized is that most real attraction takes place during the light, playful, back and forth banter that takes place early in a conversation.
Once you really begin to understand this; a whole new world opens up.
I used to think that I had to talk to a girl for awhile and have this incredibly intense conversation to get her attracted to me… but that’s just not the case.
In fact, a lot of times having an intense conversation with a woman creates too much rapport- and it’s impossible to pull back and shift gears into a more sexual realm.
What’s great about “sexy small talk” is that you can whip it out anywhere. Whether you’re in class talking with a classmate, at your job, in the bank, or a grocery store… you’re just ALWAYS ON – and you’re the guy that women want to talk to…
This doesn’t mean you’re going to get 100% of the girls you’re talking too. But it does mean that no matter who you’re talking to your both going to enjoy the conversation.
It beats the hell out of that boring, ‘try hard’, conversation that most of us have suffered through at some point.
2. How can a guy become “more funny” while talking to a woman?
It was only recently I came to realize that making women laugh was COMPLETELY different than I had previously thought.
For the longest time I used to believe that that the same humor that had my friends rolling on the floor in laughter would naturally cause the same reaction in the women I was talking to.
Wouldn’t it make sense? Isn’t comedy supposed to be universal?
But when I really started to pay attention to what women were laughing at I started to notice:
- The sarcastic wit that made me a hit around most of my guy friends very seldom got positive reactions around women.
- Some of the guys I knew who had the lamest, most childish humor, often seemed to get the best reaction of women.
- Women very rarely judged the originality and cleverness of humor the way my guy friends did.
It was right then that I came to realize that women don’t want funny.
They want fun.
I had always concentrated so hard on finding those perfect one-liners that would pronounce me the king of comedy and have my audience amazed at my originality and wit…. That I forgot who my audience was…
Women aren’t that funny.
Women don’t really care about original, witty, and sharp humor.
Women want to have fun.
They don’t want to have to think. And if your jokes are making them think too much, you’re probably taking them out of the moment.
If you’re a guy having trouble making women laugh, then your first step is to look around and pay attention to what they are actually laughing at.
- You’ll see that they much rather watch silly romantic comedies than the witty indie dark comedies that win all the awards.
- You’ll see that they don’t care much about the originality of your jokes… and in fact they are more likely to laugh at you repeating a knock knock joke you heard in the sixth grade than whatever sarcastic remark that pops into your mind.
- You’ll see that women don’t appreciate the concept of “cool” the way men do. Women would rather you take the stick out of your ass and act in a fun silly way than stand around like you’re a big shot.
- Playground humor never gets old. Never.
Women want you be around a guy that allows them to have fun. The next time that you are out with a woman and engaged in a conversation with her, make it a priority to take the conversation back to the playground.
3. You mentioned that Conversation Escalation: Make Small Talk Sexy include a special bonus, can you tell us what that is?
In Conversation Escalation: Make Small Talk Sexy we go over A LOT of specific concepts and techniques for teaching you how to create this “sexy” small talk.
And although in the program we give tons of examples… we found that guys want to be like a fly on the wall and listen in live as this sort of conversation is taking place.
So we went into a bar with a hidden mic and recorded an actual conversation- that results in a kiss close- and we let you listen to the entire thing.
Not only that, but afterwards we do a one hour commentary on the conversation. This allows you get inside Rob’s head and you’ll know exactly what made him say the things he said. It’s really a quite brilliant way to learn.
It is also lets you see how easy it is to quickly transition through topics and skip the boring shit you don’t want to be talking about.
If you’re struggling through your conversations… constantly running out things to say, resorting to “boring” small talk, or getting stuck in “friendly” conversation- than this program was meant for you.
If you want to see a sample of some of things you’re going to learn read though “Conversation Escalation: Make Small Talk Sexy”
The one thing I want to leave you with is: No matter how intimidated you are by the thought of becoming a “smooth talker”… you really are a lot closer than you think.
Once you make a handful of “tweaks” you’ll find that you actually enjoy talking to women- and will begin to see how easy it is to create attraction.